75 million years ago there was an evil galactic overlord named Xenu who ruled over 76 planets including earth (then called Teegeeack).
Due to overpopulation, Xenu decided to gather up the 13.5 trillion people on these planets and send them into volcanoes on earth off the Canary and Hawaiian Islands. He then dropped H-bombs and killed the people.
Xenu trapped the souls of these people in boxes and implanted them with a false reality. The confused souls with these false realities attached themselves in clusters to the last remaining people on Earth. Today we all hold about 2,000 alien souls that can only be released by a Scientologist with auditing sessions. So you pay lots of money to learn a bunch of self-help mind over matter tricks. In Scientology you are brainwashed into believing an un-true history, and you are promised an unattainable reward. Scientologist believe that once you have reached the upper levels of "OT" you can fly around and move things with your mind and do all sorts of fun stuff.
This cult Scientology was created by
L. Ron Hubbard, a warp minded 1950's science fiction writer.
